A Helpful Heuristic

[lillibet]

Occasionally I like to remind people of a good heuristic for deciding whether or not to hit send:

1) It is true?

2) Is it helpful?

3) Is it kind?

If what you are about to post doesn't meet at least two of the criteria, then it's usually best to hit delete instead.

Comments

Hmm.

[firstfrost.livejournal.com]

I think a lot of the things I post are true, and either interesting or amusing (well, I hope so, at least), and are while they are neither *un*helpful or *un*kind, they are also probably neither actively helpful or actively kind.

I do not think these are bad posts, so I might offer a friendly amendment to the heuristic that it check for the opposites instead. :)

Re: Hmm.

[muffyjo]

The first mentioning of this that I had ever heard was as a method to determine a reaction or a reply, you know, that email to the person you've been crushing on or the reply to your brother who is being a jerk and I tend to try think of it when I hit reply to online posts.

I think emphasizing the positive has conclusively borne out better results over time than trying to focus on the negatives although the training curve may be longer.

Re: Hmm.

[firstfrost.livejournal.com]

True, it makes a lot more sense to me when talking about a reply, I think, because there is a second person involved that one can be kind *to* or helpful *to*.

The posts I make are often things like "Here is a picture of the socks I just finished knitting!" or "I wonder how they got the cherry picker into the subway station?" - I'd claim that they're benign, though helpfulness-neutral and kindness-neutral. At worst, they're boring, but I'd hope not as bad as "best to have hit delete instead".

[miss-chance.livejournal.com]

Which reminds me that I meant to thank you, and I think I never did, even though I kept thinking about doing so. I had had a crappy, crappy day, and posted a whiney/cryptic LJ about it, and you called to check in on me. So did i_leonardo. You guys make it really hard to stay miserable and whiney! :) Thank you.

[lillibet.livejournal.com]

You are most welcome. I hope the subsequent days have been much better!