StoryWorth: Baby Stories

What stories have you been told about yourself as a baby?

I think that it’s because my sisters were old enough to remember things that happened while I was a baby and to be part of they “hey, remember when E…” conversations, my babyhood comes up in conversation pretty frequently.

I’m planning to leave this post open and add to it as I remember different stories I have been told. Maybe Beckie or Anne will chime in with additions.


- holding up my head and focusing much earlier than expected

- first word “baby,” second word “Becca,” my sister

- calling myself Ebus, much to Mom’s puzzlement

- baby words: cugar, oo-oops, i-kippies

- calling Leo “Leelow”

- freaking people out by talking so early

- kicking on the wall to make Beckie take me into bed with her

- eating bologna wrapped around gherkins and the cat nibbling the bologna out of my fingers

StoryWorth: Special Talents

What are some of your special talents?

I think of myself as fairly self-aware and unwilling to engage in false modesty. A few years ago I was part of an online bragging group--the idea was that people, especially women, tend to shy away from acknowledging their talents and hard work, believing that if something is easy for them, then it is simply easy and hardly worth doing. On the one hand it was great to have an environment in which I could brag about my accomplishments, both mundane and extraordinary. On the other hand I felt that I didn't get that much out of it because I have the great good fortune (and skill in crafting relationships) to have many people in my life to appreciate me and call my attention to the things I do well, as well as many opportunities to receive praise for my more public talents. It is still hard for me to publish a list like this without feeling horribly vain, and yet to believe that by claiming my own talents I can empower others to do likewise.

- I have beautiful handwriting.

- I have excellent reading comprehension. Those 99th percentile scores on standardized tests never seemed like a big deal, but the more time I spend working through texts with people, the clearer it is to me what a talent it is.

- I am a very good cook, both in terms of making tasty food and at putting food on the table in a timely fashion, in appropriate amounts, tailored to the tastes and restrictions of the diners.

- I am a good host. I am good at planning events and thinking of contingencies. I make people feel welcome in my home and comfortable here.

- I am an excellent public speaker. I have good diction and projection. I am not nervous, I do not giggle, or stammer, or make it look painful. I remember to slow down, to smile and pay attention to my body language. I can engage a crowd and convey the emotional content of my material clearly.

- I am a great gift-giver. I have the good fortune to be able to afford presents for people I love, but also the thoughtfulness and imagination to see what people will enjoy, but are unlikely to buy for themselves.

- I am a good friend. I remember names and details. I check in and keep in touch, but I'm also good at picking up where we left off and moving forward, despite the intervening years. I don't invest so much that I resent when it is not returned. I have a good enough sense of who my friends are and what our relationship is that I don't get mad at people for being themselves. I show up when you need me, or make sure that someone else does.

- I am an excellent storyteller. I can craft the smallest happening into a narrative with beginning, middle, and end. I can find the point of a story and make it clear to my listeners. I understand the difference between supporting detail and irrelevant minutia and more than one person has told me that they've learned, when I launch into a seeming non sequitur of a story, to just hold on because the connection is always there in the end.

- I am an excellent organizer. I can set up easily-maintained systems for keeping large amounts of information sorted and accessible--and then I actually do maintain them. I can make schedules and plans for groups large and small that keep people occupied without being overwhelmed. I can think about what people will need to anticipate problems and keep things running smoothly. And I'm good at building flexibility into the system and accepting the need to change plans and adapt to situations as I find them, without much regret for the previous version.

And I try to use my powers only for good.

Did I forget any talent you find particularly notable? What special talents do you have that you don't usually brag about?

StoryWorth: Keepsakes

Do you have any keepsakes or heirlooms from your father?

Goodness, so many! I have tried to pare down and get rid of most of my parents’ things, but it’s an ongoing process. I have documents and photos of my father’s entire life in surprising detail, even after three months of paring down all the letters, papers, photographs, etc. There are two belt buckles with Liberty dollars from the year Dad was born that seem, on the one hand, like I could easily let them go, but on the other hand like something that would have no meaning to almost anyone else and don’t have much value in themselves.

The one thing that I really take joy in is a nondescript gray sweater of my dad’s. It fits me pretty well and is super warm and comfortable, with a high neck, so it makes a great extra layer on very cold days. I always enjoyed snagging my dad’s clothes—more than my mom’s, which rarely fit me—and it’s nice to feel as though he’s still keeping me warm.

But the thing that I think of as my real treasure from my dad is not the material things that I can touch, or read, or look at. It’s the things that I learned from witnessing his work and talking with him through forty-two wonderful years. He taught me how to hold an interesting conversation, how to tell a story—which I’m actually much better at than he ever was—how to lead groups, how to be self-confident. He thought I was an amazing person—”How did you get so wise,” he once asked me—and that joy in my self is the enduring legacy that I hold.One of my therapists once said that no matter how far down she drilled, there was always a sense of self-worth, a knowledge that I am loved and worthy of love. If you asked me about my father’s flaws I could go on at least this long, but his gift to me was that enduring belief that someone has always loved me. That’s my dad.